It is hunting season in Idaho. This means men everywhere come out from their hiding spots, load up their pickups, and head to the mountains. They let their beards grow long and stay up late playing games by the fire. They spend hours hiking or riding horses in snow and cold weather and consider this to be “fun.” They pack enough bags to survive a zombie apocalypse, and maybe that is exactly what they are hoping for. This is where the hunter’s are in their element (note: my dad is in his element, full camo, his own cooking station ect.)This season is the most important thing during the year for some Idahoans. I have heard legitimate things such as this growing up in Idaho with a defined hunting season:
Girlfriend: “What if we got married next year?”
The to be Fiance: “Ya if it’s not during hunting season.”
Girlfriend: “Great, that gets rid of the end of September until next summer…”
Maybe not the to be Fiance: “Sounds good to me”
“Our divorce will have to wait until after hunting season”
Wife: I’m pregnant
Husband: “I am so excited, when are you due?”
Wife: “November 16!”
Husband: ” Can we reschedule it? That’s hunting season…”
Well, that is the case for the men in my life. Hunting season has been a thing since I can remember. My dad and brothers and occasionally my tom-boy sister would head up to their secret hunting spot (they would kill me if I told you…and they have the means to hunt me down). What they don’t know is, I look forward to this week as much as they do. If the men can go out and buy hundreds of dollars of hunting gear, gourmet food, and the massive sheepherders tents… I think it’s okay to spend a little for me…right? As a little girl, I loved hunting week because I had my mom all to myself. We would go to dinner and a movie, we would shop for ourselves, and stay up late and watch chick flicks with popcorn. These were the days. There are many woman who become bitter because their fathers, husbands, or boyfriends are hunters. Well women, if you don’t want to join them it’s time to look at it as HUNTING WEEK for you at the mall. Those holiday deals are not for nothing, go and use them. Put in as much prep for this week as the hunters do. Set up those mani/pedi appointments, hey maybe even a massage. Have a babysitter for the young kids so you can go to a movie (or 2 or 3) with your friends. Splurge and eat that chocolate molten lava cake at Apple Bee’s after eating the two for twenty by yourself. I say live the life, hunt for fun while the hunters are gone. As the boy’s pack up their trucks, you can still tell them you will miss them and it will feel like forever. They do enjoy that affection and it builds up their egos, but once they are on the road.. Wipe those fake Burts Bees Wax tears off of your facial deprived face and hit up Burger King, because this week you can have it your way. Bring on HUNTING SEASON!
I do consider myself a feminist, I meant not to offend if you are a woman hunter, all the power to you! I just don’t like to touch furry things.
No animals were harmed in writing this (C)LV2013